Thor #386 (December 1987)

Since the introduction of the Marvel Universe version of Thor back in the 1960s, he's had many adventures. Served as one of Earth's Mightiest Heroes, protected both his birth home of Asgard and adopted home of Midgard from many a threat. However, Thor's running around the Marvel Universe has opened up one question: does this mean that other pantheons exist as well besides the Norse one?

The comics' answer to the question has been a resounding "Yes". Most notably, Thor's book saw the introduction of Hercules/Herakles, and from there, the other members of the Greco-Roman pantheon. The comic we're looking at here is also a meeting between gods. This time, Thor is going to say hello to the Celtic pantheon in a Thor run that I consider criminally underrated. How did that meeting go? Let's find out in Thor #386!

The cover is a Ron Frenz and Brett Breeding piece. It's pretty awesome. It depicts Thor clashing with another god (don't worry, you'll get informed about Big Red here). And in a nice Silver Age-style touch, there's a little blurb on the corner saying "When Warriors Clash!" And that's what we'll get here.

"When Warriors Clash!" 
Writer: Tom DeFalco
Penciler: Ron Frenz
Inker: Brett Breeding
Colorist: Paul Becton
Letterer: John Workman Jr.
Editor: Ralph Macchio
Editor-in-Chief: Tom DeFalco

The story begins with a new threat to our Asgardian hero: Targo the Troll. He has a small razor. It's sharp. And he knows how to use it. And how will this troll prove to be such a great threat to our man, a god who has defeated and slain many a monster in his time?

"You're lucky I'm sober today."

Yes, Targo is...a barber!

And his nefarious plan? Shave off Thor's mighty beard!

Ha ha. Well, the Warriors Three have decided that it's time for Thor to get back to his old clean-shaven look. You see, he originally grew it out to cover up some facial scarring that Hela (Norse Goddess of the Underworld) gave him by smacking him with her Hand of Glory. But since his face got healed up in Thor #382, he no longer needs it. Even though the beard makes him look rather dignified, Thor has groused how itchy it is. Targo shaves off Thor's beard...and he looks like his old handsome self again. 

With that done, Thor has to return to Midgard, aka Earth. He is one its sworn protectors, after all. He's been away a while. I can imagine he has a lot of e-mails to catch up on. Fandral asks Thor to stay a little longer. A monster has been rumored to be terrorizing the northern counties of Asgard. He and the other Warriors Three are going to check it out. As long as Thor is here, he can come along as well, if he wants to. Thor's all for it. One last adventure with his pals? He's all for it!

Meanwhile, Balder the Brave, the new ruler of Asgard (that's a whole thing), is alerted to a new danger by his grand vizier. He shows Balder a screen that depicts the remains of the Rainbow Bridge after its destruction in Thor #351. Since then, Asgard's been...drifting through its dimension like driftwood floating on a gentle river. However, that's caused a whole new set of problems for Asgard. 

What kind of problems, you may ask? Oh, just your average bit of geological upheaval caused by Asgard drifting through the universe untethered. Balder doesn't see it as that much of a problem. After all, the vizier's magics have been able to keep them quelled so far. But that's not the biggest problem.

The vizier has also discovered that there are dimensional rifts popping up all over Asgard. These rifts are gateways to alternate universes. Something could end up stumbling through them...or an Asgardian may end up lost in another dimension. As if to prove the vizier's point, a strange black cat is seen watching the vizier and Balder converse. The cat then leaves through one of the said portals...and then we learn this cat was no ordinary fuzzy feline.

"The Egyptian pantheon had raging Selina Kyle envy."

I wonder if this character was inspired by Isis. Anyway, she reports to her master that the Asgardians are aware of the rifts, implying they're intentional. And who is her master?

"I deserve to be on a GQ cover. Look at me! I'm beautiful!"

Meet Set (or Seth as he is called here), the Egyptian God of Death. Basically, he's the Goth Kid of the Egyptian pantheon. In real life mythology, he's the god of violence, deserts, disorder, and foreigners. 

Seth is not worried about it. After all, as far as he's concerned, that knowledge won't help the Asgardians. Egyptian Catwoman did a good job, so Seth rewards her by...turning her to dust.

Dude, I get that death is your purview and all, but you had a cat woman who used as a spy. I think she would have been handy to keep around. I mean, nothing indicated that she was incompetent or bad at her job. Heck, based on this, we can say she was good at her job. Why dispose of a perfectly useful minion like that?!

This is Thor's book, so let's look in on him and the Warriors Three, shall we? They find a wrecked farmhouse, indicating a monster was in the area. The three hear a scream, and Thor flies off with his hammer to check it out. And he finds the monster.

"WHERE MY MONEY, WOMAN?!"

Boy, that is an ugly mothertrucker. But Thor is not intimidated by ugliness. He tries to give the monster a taste of hammer time, but it's as tough as it is ugly. The monster leaps at Thor, only to vanish in a mystic portal. With that out of the way, Thor checks on the young woman the monster was attacking. Unfortunately, her injuries are too severe, and she dies in his arms, calling for Thor to avenge her and her family.

Thor intends to do that, following the creature into the portal on his own.

Thor finds that the portal has led him to Avalon, home of the Celtic Gods. They and the Asgardians have had a long-standing feud. He finds another wrecked village, and more death and destruction greet him. This makes Thor more determined to bring the beast down. After all, these villagers may have been of Avalon, but they were still innocent people. It's then that he encounters a group of angry Celts.

"Boy, Celtic tax collectors are pushy."

Naturally, they think Thor did this. Thor is innocent, but he's not willing to let these men execute him for a crime he did not commit. He knocks the Celts away, and one of their gods has come to intervene.

"My name is Leir! And I love to fight!"

Meet Leir, the Lord of Lightning and the God of the Spear. He's presumably based on the Celtic mythological sea god Lir. Leir thinks Thor butchered this village, which is not true. The two Thunder Gods end up fighting. Thor has no real desire to do so, as Leir is just defending his people. However, Thor is aware that the Celts have a reputation for treachery, so the monster that attacked Asgard could have been sent by them, and this is all just a fake-out on Leir's part. 

However, during the fight, Leir himself also questions if Thor really did destroy the Avalon village and slaughter its inhabitants. After all, he seems to come off as a noble warrior. But he is still Asgardian, and Leir cannot take Thor's word completely seriously because of that. The two continue their brawl. 

Back in Asgard, the Warriors Three argue over what do to next. Fandral sees the portal closing and wants to warn Thor. Volstagg refuses as he said Thor told them to wait here. Hogun is all basically "Screw this, I'm going in!" and leaps into the portal. 

It takes him to Avalon, where he sees Thor and Leir duking it out. He spots the monster and calls out to them about it. Leir doesn't believe it at first until he sees it attack more villagers. The three then go attack the monster. They manage to badly wound it, and it flees through the closing portal. Hogun and Thor go in hot pursuit, Leir telling them he and Thor can finish their fight another time. Thor and Leir are left having a sort of mutual respect for each other. The two Asgardians emerge from the portal, finding that Fandral and Volstagg have taken care of the beast.

A few hours later, Thor prepares to finally return to Earth. Balder bids him farewell. Asgard will miss him, but Earth still needs its God of Thunder. Thor uses his hammer to create a magic vortex that will take him back to Earth. He vanishes as the vizier screams to stop him. He's discovered that Asgard and Earth are no longer in contact. As such, Thor's just sent himself...into space.

"Why didn't I bring my spacesuit?!"

Thor is mighty, but even he still needs to breathe. Could this be the end of our man? Well, not really. But we'll have to wait until the next issue to find out how he survives this.

I enjoyed this issue. It's always fun seeing Marvel tackle other pantheons beyond the Norse ones. Leir and Thor's meeting uses the classic formula of "two characters fight then team-up against another threat", but it works. Tropes Are Not Bad, after all. I also enjoyed the interplay between the Warriors Three and Thor. You really get the impression that these guys have been friends for a very long time. I also like Ron Frenz's art. While at this point, he's not quite channeling Jack Kirby like he will later on, this is still great to look at. 

If you want to read this story for yourself, I recommend tracking down the 2013 trade paperback Thor Epic Collection Vol. 16: War of the Pantheons. Thanks for reading this blog entry! If you liked it, show it off! Take care of yourselves and each other! See you next time!