Saturday, July 20, 2019

Marvel Super Heroes: Secret Wars #7 (November 1984)

The Secret Wars rage on! Last time, we witnessed Doctor Doom a-plottin', the X-Men a-brawlin', and the Wasp a-dyin'. So what is the fallout from all of this? Will Doom succeed in his plan for ultimate power? Will the X-Men finally get with the program and join the other heroes? Let's find out in my review of Marvel Super Heroes: Secret Wars #7! Also, on another note, it's appropriate this come out this week as it's the 50th anniversary of the Apollo Moon Landing, and this story is set in space.


The cover is a Bob Layton piece, and it's pretty cool. You have Captain America front and center, looking like he's torn, that the Star-Spangled Man with a Plan has a LOT on his mind. Around him we see the new Spider-Woman. We also see Titania pummeling She-Hulk, and the X-Men's Rogue, Cyclops, and Wolverine facing off against Absorbing Man, Volcana, and Doctor Doom. Also, we see the deceased Wasp lying on a slab. It's funny because some of this stuff happened in the last issue, ha ha!

"Berzerker!"
Writer: Jim Shooter
Penciler: Mike Zeck
Inker: John Beatty
Colorist: Christie Scheele
Letterer: Joe Rosen
Editor: Tom DeFalco
Editor-in-Chief: Jim Shooter

The story begins with Johnny Storm discovering that a new player has arrived on this big cosmic board:


Meet Julia Carpenter, aka Spider-Woman II. The other heroes realize she's from Earth, like them. She explains that she's from a suburb of Denver, which ended up part of Battleworld. I wonder why Monica Rambeau didn't discover this? And why didn't the Beyonder include her among the heroes? Julia wants to help, and she demonstrates her power to lift big boulders and throw them. She asks if they're worried that she's on their side, but Cap doubts it. Doom has plenty of power at his side. Although, considering it's Doom we're talking about here, I can imagine him being of the mentality that more is always good.

In a funny moment, Spider-Man grumbles about her stealing his gimmick. Heh. Tony Stark will be doing something about a similar problem in the future. The villains' big red tank from the previous issue arrives at the village and blows some stuff up. The Wrecker pops out and announces that he's got a gift for the heroes. He tosses the Wasp's corpse to them, then they leave. The heroes try to get her to Zsaji, but there's nothing she can do. Well, considering that Wasp was shot in the chest, yeah.

Naturally, the heroes want to get some payback, but Captain America reminds them of something. Galactus is still there, still building his energy-conversion machine. If he completes it, everyone is dead anyway. This leads the heroes to argue over what to do next...and an angry She-Hulk stomps off.

Professor Xavier orders Cyclops, Rogue, and Wolverine to pursue the group of villains they engaged in the last issue. He, Magneto, Nightcrawler, and Storm will meet them on the way. They have a chance to trap Doctor Octopus, Molecule Man, Titania, and the Absorbing Man, and they're going to take it!


On board the four villains' ship, Titania is looking over the injured Molecule Man. This is shown on a screen in Doombase. Volcana sees this and freaks out. She tries to get Klaw to help her get to him...but he's nuts, so he's no help at all. She then goes to the Enchantress, who doesn't care, and calls her fat. Volcana pleads with her to help, so Amora agrees...for a price.


Yeah, Amora is a jerk, but there is something I have to point out. Both she and Klaw refer to Volcana as being a bit overweight. Yeah, Amora does it because she's a jerk, and she hates other women, especially any she feels threatens her in the beauty department. But Klaw refers to her as "plump", and the way Mike Zeck draws her...she doesn't look any bit "plump". I think there was some miscommunication there. Anyway, you know Amora's going to demand her payment in the future...

Anyway, she arrives, and we get a hint that Titania and Volcana were old friends. The X-Men intercept the villains and make them crash their ship. With that, the fight is on. Professor Xavier tries to attack the villains' minds, but has found that the Enchantress has mystically shielded them. Wolverine manages to cut off Absorbing Man's arm (Carl Creel turned himself into rock, so it's hardly gory). Eventually, the X-Men are able to drive the villains to retreating.

On Galactus's spaceship, Doom is growing a bit desperate, although he'll never admit it. He's found many wonderous devices in Galactus's ship, but he wants something that will ensure that he'll be supreme for certain. How much longer can he sneak around before somehow alerting Galactus? Speaking of the...man, I guess, himself...


Galactus himself is working on his machine, and he looks like he's almost done. However, he senses the violent volcanic eruptions that the X-Men had set off. This annoys the cosmic being, as he has to fix the planet. Remember as far as we know, Battleworld may be the only planet left thanks to the Beyonder. If it gets blown up, Galactus starves to death. Yeah, he'd starve to death anyway, but Galactus is not going to just let an opportunity to avert that a little longer just go by. He then senses Doom on his ship. The World-Eater realizes "Hey, there's some jerk rooting around in my house! He's messing up my stuff! Jerk!", and sends him flying.


I can imagine Doom is cursing Reed Richards out the entire trip down, ha ha! And with that taken care of, it's back to work for Galactus. At the Doombase, the villains recover from the thrashing the X-Men gave them. Absorbing Man was able to retain the arm that Wolverine severed and does a little experiment.


Maybe you shouldn't take on Wolverine anymore, Carl. And it's a good thing that it worked. But it's not completely implausible. He did survive being shattered in the form of glass. While this is going down, the Wrecking Crew are trying to get the enraged Lizard into a cage. They succeed, but not without some great effort on their part. Bulldozer of the Crew goes to rest while the others get some chow. He notices that someone tore open the wall to his quarters. It was an angry She-Hulk, who wants to...discuss the death of Wasp with him. In the form of her fists rearranging his face. Her beatdown is witnessed by the rest of the Wrecking Crew...and Titania.

After the Gamma Glamazon takes down the Crew, she and Titania brawl. Yeah, the two end up developing quite a rivalry over the years, and this was where it started. Titania would become the closest thing She-Hulk had to a regular archnemesis. Doctor Doom and Absorbing Man show up to give Titanis some extra muscle...despite her angrily insisting she doesn't want it.

In her own chamber, the Enchantress is miserable. So, Amora being Amora. She's lamenting that they could all die here, which means she can't take over Asgard. Hey Amora, we don't always get what we want in life. She hears a noise, and finds a busted-up Doctor Doom.


He straggles to a bed, and he just mutters that it's all over. Meanwhile, She-Hulk is enduring a beatdown from the Wrecking Crew and Titania...and the green-skinned powerhouse appears to have stopped moving. Meanwhile, Captain America is watching Galactus. The cosmic force has appeared to have finished his conversion apparatus, but doesn't appear to be using it. It confuses Cap. What changed?

Hawkeye comes up and reports that everyone has finally noticed She-Hulk is missing. They figure she went after the villains herself, and she's going to need help. Hulk pleads with Cap to let him find her, as she's family. However, as much as Cap wants to help, they have to monitor Galactus. You know Steve, you could just send Monica out to find her. She can cover the planet rather quickly as a beam of light. She'd find Shulkie in a very short time.

Meanwhile, Colossus is wandering the alien town, still dealing with his injuries. He wants to get back into fighting shape, so he figures Zsaji would be able to help with her healing powers. He finds her leaving the hut where the Wasp's body is being held until burial...but she looks very weak and collapses.

Cap gets a telepathic call from Charles Xavier. He offers to have the X-Men watch Galactus while Cap and the other heroes search for She-Hulk. About time you X-Clowns helped out! Cap agrees, and yep, it's time to storm the Doombase!

This comic was okay, but I think there was some lost potential there for story stuff. I would have liked to have seen the heroes mourn Wasp a bit, especially the Avengers. She was a founder of the group after all. I also would have liked to have seen some more interaction between Colossus and Zsaji. As I said in a past review, Shooter wanted to end the romance between Colossus and Kitty Pryde, and having them interact more would have helped make it more plausible. Also, as I said, I really don't like the X-Men's portrayal here. It was nice to see them finally help the other heroes out.

I did like that we got some hints that Titania and Volcana were old friends. Allows for further fleshing out and character development down the road. I also got a chuckle out of Galactus casually tossing Doctor Doom out of his ship. And since we got a couple of new villains, only right that we get a new hero on board in the form of Julia Carpenter. It's a nice teaser, and the moment where Spider-Man grumbles about her is pretty funny. I also liked seeing the heroes rally together to avenge Wasp and She-Hulk.

Thanks for reading this blog entry! If you liked it, spread it around! And I am working on finding something new to further support the blog. See you next time, when we resume a look at the Justice Society's fight against treason charges...

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